Monday, November 4, 2013

What Do You Mean I Can't Change You?

Women love a great project. We love DIY and making things are own. One of the major projects we love to take on is changing others, especially our significant other. 

I recently relocated and had all these expectations on what my husband should and shouldn't do. I had my timeline, packing sheets, he bought the boxes, we were ready to go. But, what I invisioned in my mind didn't materialize in my experience. I was inwardly seething and of course started going over my mantra of if I coulda, woulda, shoulda. And then one day, the Spirit said to me, this is who he is, why are you getting upset and expecting what he isn't willing or capable of giving. This thought changed my whole demeanor. First, I thought, this situation wasn't a deal breaker, so I wasn't leaving. I knew all the responsibilities he had, and lastly, I had more time and energy to get it done. So, I completed my tasks with a inner peace and did my best, not saying anything to him until two days before our move.  But, to my delight when we reached our new home he began the job of unpacking and placing things in their proper places once the children and I were asleep. Each day I awoke to a home forming before my eyes. 

The valuable lessons I learned were that I had to accept what I couldn't change, which is my husband. I can influence him for good or evil, that's it. And the only person I can change is me. When I made peace with my emotions there was no drama and I received a special gift of him literally doing the heavy lifting. These truths freed me and made me see the wonderful gift I had, just the way he is. Trust God with those you love. See and accept them for who they are and enjoy the journey. Peace and Blessings- ULM

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