Saturday, December 8, 2012

No, You Didn't?

Have you ever found yourself asking the questions, "how could they?" or "how could they do this to me?" In these times we have been exposed to the negative side of a person. What are we supposed to do with the pain, disappointment, anger, and disillusionment? First, we are to give it to God. Cast your cares on him for he cares for you. Second, we are to be real with how we are feeling and process those feelings. Stuffing negative emotions don't make them go away, it just makes them show up later in our lives when we least expect them. Third, communicate the hurt and betrayal to the person if it was a personal attack. If the offense was done to someone else, then pray for everyone concerned. Good people can do bad things.Sometimes the best of us make wrong decisions and do things that we later regret. Clear the air, as you do this you may discover what was at the heart of their actions, which most of the time is some sort of inward pain that is causing them to act out negatively. Fourth, forgive them. Forgiveness is a process, but it will lead to your healing and release from the emotions associated with the offense. And finally, examine yourself. Look to see where you have hurt, betrayed, and lied and ask for God to forgive you. If the offense was done personally to you, see if you played a part in the situation and if so, take responsibility for your part. Pray for the person that caused the offense and those they offended. These steps are not for those that want to be angry, bitter, victimized and depressed. This process takes courage, will, and a dependence on God to get you through this tough time. Can it be done? Yes, it can. The WHY of what they did may never be discovered or understood, but you can make peace with it for your own emotionally health. And what you may realize is you can see how they did what they did and develop some compassion and mercy on them.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Love On A Two-Way Street!

And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these. Mark 12:31

Have you ever wondered why its so hard for you to get along with some people? You may have sent out unloving thoughts and words that repels them from being in your presence. When people are practicing Godly love, unGodly love cannot dwell in that place and space. Even when there has been an offense towards you, your response has to be in love for there to be healing and relationship.The Bible teaches us to love thy neighbor as thyself.When we receive the love of God and love him, then we realize how much we should love ourselves. The measure in which we love ourselves is the same measure we will love others. So, if you do not love yourself, you are not capable of loving others. Only a love that is conditional, judgmental, fearful, controlling, envious and abusive can stand outside of God's love. The more you are gracious, merciful, kind, and loving to yourself, the more you can be to others. Then you can take them and yourself off the crosses of crucifixion you have erected. Jesus has already been crucified for us, so there is no need to put yourself and others on crosses of pain and punishment. Receive and give love and watch how people will be drawn to you. Is everyone meant to be in your life? No, but in love you will determine who should and can be!